One day you are together, and everything is fine with you, but the partner is already moving away from you, becoming cold and indifferent. The first thought that arises in response to this behavior: love is over. Maybe the feelings just cooled down, or maybe a loved one has found someone else. The reaction to this discovery can be very sharp and painful, but psychologists recommend 5 not to stress out. Here are some tips to help you understand what’s going on and make the right decision.
1. Take a break
Yes, it is very hard. But if you emotionally express your suspicions to your partner, then it will not be good for you or them. Suddenly your intuition lets you down, and the person has other reasons for detachment: problems at work, fatigue, bad mood? There may be simply no strength to manifest love and care.
In these cases, accusations will definitely not strengthen the relationship. So it’s better to exhale and do nothing for at least a couple of days. If you’ve found your partner online, remember that it is essential to talk and discuss everything. Moreover, Russian brides on https://brides4love.com/russian-brides are faithful and kind. They will be happy to discuss everything with you.
2. Analyze the situation
Try to separate your feelings and fears from the facts. What really happened? What is it in your partner’s behavior that indicates that they cooled to you? Are there any real signs?
Let’s say they objectively spend less time with you: earlier, you talked every night after work and watched TV shows together on Fridays, but now it has come to naught. Or your partner has stopped hugging you and showing sexual interest. Such an analysis will help you figure out if there are really alarm calls or, it just seemed to you. Besides, specific facts will come in handy when talking with your partner.
3. Talk to your loved one
Try to stay calm. Do not blame or raise your voice, but explain as much as possible what bothers you. Use “I” messages for this:
- No: “You don’t communicate with me at all! You don’t love me anymore!”
- Yes: “I am very upset that we are spending less time together. We used to go for a walk every weekend, but for more than a month, I have been spending them alone.”
Talk about your feelings, but also remember the facts. Arguments like “it seems to me” will not sound very convincing and can be easily dismissed.
4. Be prepared to resist
Even if the feelings are really over, the partner may not immediately admit it. First, they need time to understand and accept everything. Secondly, they may be afraid of hurting you, so they will begin to deny everything: “No, you don’t understand everything that way. I love you very much!” A person can explain coldness, closeness, and aloofness by fatigue or other reasons.
If you are both confused and no longer know how you feel, it is worth looking for a good family therapist. They will help you understand yourself and find a way out.